This hand is worth 7.5 point in the hutchinson point system, again not the hand to be really entirely happy with, to say the least, but the problem is that everyone calls, and I already have .02$ in the pot, and only need to add .02$ more to join! What can I do but call? Well. I called, but I think, in retrospect I shouldn’t have. There is nothing that can make happy on the flop, so why call, even if it is really cheap. But I called, so there was no way back out of this horrible story!

What a fantastic flop!

Ok, so this flop with 2 kings on it doesn’t seem so great, so I check, everyone else checks so I am happy to see a free turn, or am I? Actually I am not really happy. I mean come one, just let me fold so I can see some porn, I can’t hit anything! But ok, I need to see a turn aswell. A 5 comes, and the board gets 2 flush draws aswell. I have one of them but I couldn’t care less, I see Player 2 betting .04$ and am happy to fold and make some tea. Off the the next hand!

After my fold

Well after my fold Player 2 makes another great .04$ bet on the river, and this time Player 4 decides against calling, a healthy choice, Player 2 takes the pot and I am happy to drink my tea and get some new cards from our handsome dealer.

This hand is worth 8.5 points in the hutchinson point count system, 1 for the 5 high flush change, 1.5 for the 9 high flush change, 1 for the straight chance with 5 and 3 and 5 for the straight change between five, eight and nine. Not really a combination of real killer cards. The colors look fancy but it is quite a shit hand, I would consider wiping my ass with it, but it doesn’t go much further.

Yes I get to play for free!

As the action comes to me, the BB, it seems no one raised, so I happily check the hand and hope for a poker miracle! And the flop come Jh5d5c, oh the joy! I make my little happy dance and I get 1 BB into the huge pot *coughs*! Everyone calls and we move to a 10h river. I once again bet 1 full BB into this even bigger pot and once again everyone calls (exiting eh?).

A most terrifying river!

Oh disaster strikes on the river! All my big bets are now stuck in the pot and a Qh comes! Now all sorts of flushes are possible, a billion of different straights aswell. I have no choice to make a scared check and await the results. Player 2 checks aswell, and he should have bet at least 1/2 of the pot here, I mean who won’t believe him on such a river? But he doesn’t, and I win the glorious .40$ pot, bang!

>As you can see I start UTG or on the cutoff, with the glorious omaha hand ’6d2cQd7h’. This hand is worth 6.5 points in the hutchinson point count system, we get 4 points for the 67 combination and 2.5 points for the Queen high flush possibility.

“I Fold”

I decide this hand isn’t worth it and throw it away rather quickly. Even if I would hit a flush, I would not be happy. Only if the king of diamonds and the ace of diamonds fall on the flop, and I get a third diamond while there is no pair on the board I could make the nuts. 67 also has some nut possibilities but they are so vulnerable, really, it is best to fold such a sad sad hand.

The rest of the hand

The action that follows is also rather sad, Player 3 keeps on betting one big blind on every turn, while he should have just fired a big one on the river. In the end it seems I would have won this hand with a double pair, but hey, rule number one, don’t look back on your actions based on the cards that fall after you fold, it is a very bad practice and will damage your play in the long run. Be happy to fold such a losing Omaha Hand.

Tea woke up with TsTd4sQd, not the best hand, but as this crazy man’s bankroll would be burned quickly, he had to act quickly to get a piece of the pie, so he raised before Fabien could take any action. Fabien replied with his own raise, a full pot raise, as is common in Omaha Poker. So 2 full pot raises and a call later, the pot is almost 8$ high and Tea has 32$ left. The crazy Fabien person had 74$ left and was heading for another pot bet on the flop. The flop came 9sJsAh, a flush/straight draw for Tea, and a good place for Fabien to try and pretend that he had something. But that was a completely unbelievable bet, since he would do that on every spot in any situation; he just loved and had sex with the bet/raise/push button, hitting that sweet spot in the hope people would be afraid and run with their genitals in their hands.

Tea didn’t grab his genitals, he didn’t collapse in fear. He had more outs for winning than the winning hand had at that time, so Fabien’s 95% range probable wouldn’t come near to success, and even if he did, well, Tea would have gotten his money in good, and in the end that all that you want to do, get that money in good and leave the table with positive expected value (EV).

See you in a few days for more!

Mad Max

Starting with a $500 bankroll and moving up in Omaha Poker

Tea made it big yesterday; he decided to play Omaha poker on line a few weeks ago and started with a $500 bankroll. After a lot of bad beats, a lot of crying and an extremely deadly amount of tea. He finally got his bankroll to $2000, so he could move up to the $25 buy in tables! He is a lot more obsessed with achieving then we are, and less with having fun! But hey, he might be wealthy one day!

(But we will have more fun)

The Need Of Social Control When Playing Omaha Poker

So he got to $2000, and he went to the $25 tables just the day before yesterday, he updated me on his progress every hour, it helps him concentrate and prevents steaming, well that’s what he tells us! But I understand the method, lonely steaming is a lot more dangerous than when you do it socially, since you lose reality a lot faster! And therefore lose more money on poker, which is quite sad, and sad is bad! At first it was quite boring, just a few bad beats, a few regular wins, no profits though, but he has quite a good rakeback so it doesn’t matter that much. Then, after the 5^th hour his bad beats turned into glorious wins and he won almost all 70/30 and even 60/40 odds. His bankroll soared to $2400 in just a few hours, he was obviously happy, his stress levels were greatly reduced and all of the sudden a player called ‘Fabien’ came to play on one of his tables. He didn’t have any statistics on him (yes, Tea uses statistics now, dam him!) so played it really slow at first, but not having any stats on a person, gives a lot of chance on a donk, since he is obviously not a regular, which is another pointer from Tea. He is getting quite smart these days, should we follow, I wonder?

Meeting On The On Line Tables | A Total Poker Donk Brings Happiness and Money!

This ‘Fabien’ dude played almost more than 95% of his Omaha V$PIP poker hands, which, if you are unfamiliar with the game, about 60% too much. Tea quickly picked up on this, but didn’t get any good hands at first. And Fabien got really lucky; he busted a few other players with hands like 7h4cQsJd against AhAs3s4h. Very awful for the other regulars on his table, but Tea got more and more excited since he would could not only win the first $25 but also a whole lot more, since our villain now had more than $75 on the table. Tea only had $32 though, so he had to climb up to more, or just two shot him. But two shotting a donk in Omaha poker can be very dangerous! Since a lot of situations can be 65/35 to 55/45, even if you are against quite a bad hand. If we think about winning two 65/35 type situations, we are less optimistic, especially if we need to win both to win it all, and the donk only needs one to win it all.

You know what? I’ll leave you in dangerous excitement until our next meeting!

(That’s what I love)

Greets,

X

A Couple of Poker Friends in Amsterdam, Playing T8s on the button

I was in Amsterdam last weekend, invited by a couple of poker friends I met in Antwerp for an underground poker game (Texas Hold ‘em), and I had the time of my life, what beautiful women and groovy clubs I enjoyed! But first and foremost, I enjoyed a nice game of professional poker; at least I thought I would, since as you will see in the next hand, the play was very loose. So as a consequence, I didn’t enjoy a nice game of professional poker, but I enjoyed a nice game of “giving Mad money”. Ok, I admit, this hand I got a little lucky, but the play here is terrible! I woke up on the button with a nice Ts8s suited, and I really was running quite well, I just bought in short once for $20. And given the fact that there were so many limpers in front of me, and a stupid min-raise from the cutoff, I wanted to make it a juicy pot, in case I would hit something really nice!

Making the Big Move, Raising On The Button

So I raised to $3, the small blind decides it is time to make his move and makes it $7,5. What an asshole, and also, a stupid asshole, being out of position and all! 2 other idiots call, and obviously, this is the best position I could ever be in, in position, against 3 Dutch assholes. The pot was $31 going to the flop, which couldn’t have been better for me, at least I thought. 9sTc3s, top pair, flush potential, and even a small chance on a straight! The small stack, on the big blind, makes his *move* with $2 in the $31 pot, I laughed for half an hour and raised him to $10,50. Everyone called, and we went to the turn, which not only gave me some straight chances, but also completed my flush! The small blind once again thinks it is time to show the length of his masculinity and bets $40. Small stack calls his with his remaining money, and I obviously raise all-in without thinking twice. The small blind shows a set of tens and the big blind, who was short stacked, so he didn’t have the right to the whole pot, showed a flush draw to an Ace high flush. So only another spade would be able to hurt my hand, or a doubling up of the board.

Poker, Amsterdam and Joints

Tension was rising as the plants were burned in all corners of our table, this *is* Amsterdam after all. The small blind begged me to run it twice, but I refused, while I had another taste of my ‘joint’. Confident that the last card wasn’t going to be anything that would make me cry. But then I saw the spade and I hit the table magnificently hard with my fist. And as the big blind is ready to take all the chips, the dealer says “Max wins the pot, straight flush Q high”. I felt ashamed, but also totally relieved and overjoyed, since the parties in Amsterdam are quite expensive, I could go to a club, visit the “walletjes” and after that, have myself some champagne with a gorgeous friend I had waiting there that night.

Safe to say, the night was perfect, I even won $200 more, and left 2 others broke and begging for a “trekje” before the night was over.

And the night was far from over, not while I was in Amsterdam.

-Mad

I like leaving things to the imagination, makes life more interesting, it is one of the reasons I like poker. So much in poker is left to the imagination, forever even. Remember that time you did not know what your opponent had after that difficult laydown? You will never know, ever. Even if he told you his hand, he will still never know what the hell he had in his hands; most poker players are very good at lying. It comes with the territory, obviously.

So, why do I suck at poker, you ask? Well I just like leaving things to the imagination, I don’t like reading books that explain all the finer things of poker, then the mystery dies, and I play poker for fun, and the fun is in the X, the x-factor so to speak. One of the people who I really like, who just is the x factor, is Daniel Negreanu, look at his take on some tells, ways to explain the mystery.

Hello world (as word press so very much likes to say!),

I’m T, as you saw on the introduction that Mad and G-spot made. The T has nothing to do with my name, I just like to drink a shitload of Tea while playing poker, it keeps me focused and calm at the same time. And Tea quickly becomes just the one letter “T”. I’m quite unfamiliar with the internet, so I’ll just leave it to Mad and G-spot to edit the site, I’ll just mail them my updates. Also, I don’t like to have my real name on this website, since no one really knows I play poker each time I tell people I’m going to drink some Tea in my room.

So just call me T or Tea, if you ever want to comment.

I’m not too good in poker either, but Mad asked me if I wanted to contribute so I will, from time to time. But don’t expect too much!

Cya on the on line poker tables,

T

I’m G-spot, and no, that doesn’t really refer to that sweet spot ladies have somewhere Max will never go, at least never more than once, if you catch my drift? (I just like teasing our little Max so much). My actual name is actually Spot, and after a short lived flying career they found it really amusing to call me G-spot, since my body is the only one in our group that reached some G’s. At first it really penetrated my soul, since I dropped out, but oh well, it reminds me of sweet girls in my bed. So I have come to embrace it. Who doesn’t like thinking about sweet girls?

The Why Of Holdem Poker

I just wanted to say, I love poker, usually I play Texas Hold ‘em, less cards, and I just love to bluff all day long, it just invigorates my mojo, lights a fire in my genitals. Ouch, this reminds me of a hand I played years ago, I think it was one of my first (and last) evenings at the liefkenshoekdreef (memorable place, believe me). I had just won a couple of small hands, everyone was constantly folding to my 9c2c and Kh2c hands, I was such a bully, loved it, since once I got a real hand, no one would believe me. And this was one of the sweetest hands I ever played, if not the sweetest. We were playing $50 buying no limit Texas Hold ‘em, with .50/.50 blinds. Everyone was really scared shitless, especially when I raised and re-raised out of position, they just couldn’t figure it out!

A Holdem Hand To Remember, QQ On The Cutoff

This hand was epic. It started out when I had just re-raised with 5h2s on the button, pre flop, and the cutoff quickly folded his KJ off. This time I got QcQs on the cutoff, and I made the same standard raise, 2 times the pot to $5. The button flat called me, and the small and big blinds also called. This was getting very interesting; QQ and 4 of the 6 players came along for a nice $20.5 pot. The flop came out 8c9c2h. The small blind instantly bet $9, big blind called, I min raised to $18 and everyone else called. A $92.5 pot, and no one was going to give this one up, when the turn came a Qh, I think I jizzed in my pants, I’m not really sure, but I sure came close. Mr. Small blind checked, as did the big blind, I bet $40 of my remaining $120, the button went all-in with his last $35, the small blind shoved with his $200+ stack, big blind called with his remaining $100, and I of course called away my last $80. This pot was $92.50 + $120 + $35 + $100 + $120 = $467.50!!! The river was a 2s and my boxers went to total ruin. The small blind had to show first, and turned over some nice bullets, the big blind put up a real smile and showed a full house, nines over deuces. I laughed very loudly for like 10 minutes, crying my eyeballs out, showing them the nuts, Queens over deuces. The short stacked button quickly mucked, grunting loudly.

Safe to say, I immediately quit the table and went to a friend of mine who happened to be a girl and quickly finished my evening in style.

See you blokes around later,

G-spot!

My Omaha Poker Name and The M-High

I’m all for introductions, and I won’t hide behind the first letter of my name, my name is Max. Friends usually call me Mad Max for all the crazy stuff I pull when I’m drunk, but at the tables, when we are playing sweet Omaha Poker, they just call me Mad. So the “M” kind of suits me, but never call me MM or god forbid M&M. I hate that those shitty balls of color crap. Like one of the last hands I played, I think it was yesterday, not sure though, days just fly by, playing poker all day long can really get your head in a spin you’ll never get a grip on. It’s like a really cool high, let’s call it the M-high from now on. Yeah.

An Example Omaha hand; Tc6c9h5c

Anyway, I got Tc6c9h5c, what a cool hand, I was even on the cutoff, so my day just couldn’t get any better, you know? Oh and I forgot to mention, the guy in middle position limped, what a donk. So I go ahead and make a standard pot raise, like I always do in this spot, and I make it $1.10 to go. The dealer calls me smoothly, but then my day goes to total ruin as the middle position man re-raises me to $4.75, I mean what the hell. He thinks he is superman or something? I instantly call him, no hesitation, showing him who is the real man at the table, and the button calls, as he is short stacked, he shows he is a real donk by not moving all in with his remaining $3.52. I feel like I played it perfectly until this point.

Disaster Flop, Horrible Turn Card

But then, the flop comes, and I see God has abandoned me, “Qs2h3c”, I mean, such a beautiful hand, how could I miss? Anyway, the pot is $14.60 and I’m not about to give this hand up, so much money, I could buy myself another pack of condoms! But then something really odd happens, the Middle man bets $6.93 dollars into the pot. What is he trying to tell me here? That he did a 69 with 3 girls last night? That he likes anything that divides by 3? I just couldn’t figure it out, so I naturally folded, having no clue whatsoever. The button called with his remaining $3.52 making it a $21.64 pot.

Unable to buy any condoms

The turn though, spelled disaster for the remainder of my once beautiful evening, a 4s, that would have made me a straight and lots of condoms. The river was a Qc which made the button a set of Queens, he held Qh6sAd7d and the donk Middle man made Aces up with his Ac6hKhAh, the better donk won, but my evening was ruined. In the end I lost $129.2 and went to sleep without a good night kiss for myself.

Peace out,

Mad (Max)

Do we really need any kind of introduction? I’m not sure, because we are a BANGING foursome of poker enthusiasts with one thing in common, we suck at poker, or so they say, but we just don’t care. These days there are so many boring and irrelevant sites about poker strategies and they all just have way too many numbers inside of them! We never studied anything remotely close to math, we don’t even know what ‘odds’ really mean (2:1, does that mean I have 33% or 50% chance of winning a hand?!). So we tried to read books, we tried to analyze all of the poker blogs out there, but you know what? They suck at poker, and we rule at poker, but you will think we suck. So we suck!

So, you ask yourself, why do you guys play poker? We are just so very, very lucky, why shouldn’t we play poker?

Peace out!

M, G, T and X